Dang, it's that time of year...AGAIN.

I could escape it no longer-my annual "womanly" exam. After canceling and rescheduling twice, the inevitable arrived this morning. In all honesty, I think Steve is more anxious than I. Worried that after being "violated", (straight from his mouth), that I will not want to have sex for quite some time. It all boils down to that doesn't it: Sex. Whatever rocks your boat, I guess.

I have a great doctor, he delivered my two youngest children. Which were by far my best deliveries. But I have to say when I first met the guy 4 years ago, I thought he was gay. When he was about to put the tools in, I thought to myself, "I guess it alright that a gay guy is doing this to me." Then he started talking about his wife, dang! Awkwardness returns.

Out of all my visits to this doctor, I think Steve has come with me once. Fine by me. I think it is kinda lame to bring your husband along. Come on, Women's Lib is in full swing. But that one visit left a lasting impression. Steve still giggles about how when the doctor exams me he is apologizing the whole time. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry."

Today's visit, came and went with no problems. Just some funny tidbits, that I think I will share.

One of the most important parts of the visit is the breast exam. As the doctor lifted up my gown to play, he asked me if I breastfed my children. This made me laugh. "Are they really that bad?" I teased, "I did not realize they were shriveled". I assumed he asked me that because of the way they looked. Turns out it wasn't. Your chances of breast cancer decrease if you feed your child the golden milk. He did add however, if I had an extra four grand lying around it would be a good investment. I totally agree with him.

Then I asked him about the recent study, saying women do not need a pap-smear every year. He told me he thinks I qualify for skipping some years. Here is what he said:

"Seeing as you are healthy, have had many normal exams,

and are in a monogamous relationship,

I think you are in a monogamous relationship, a, a, a,

well I am just guessing that you are,

I guess it is none of my business."

Stammer, stammer, stammer.

What the hell? What kind of vibe am I putting out! Of course I am in a monogamous relationship. I love my husband. Maybe the doctor has seen the movie, The waitress, one two many times. Yeah, great movie, but that doesn't happen. Well I think it doesn't happen, I am guessing it does not happen, I have no idea if it happens. (For those who have not seen the movie, the ob/gyn has an affair with his patient).

Great visiting with you doc, until next year.....

Who remembers this episode, where the men were quite taken by Marie's feminine-like sculpture?